i just asked this really old dude–checking out the hottie jailbaits in sheer wifebeaters–at starbucks what it was like when he heard elvis died:

alaskamiller:

he said everyone hung out on their yards to chat about it all night. (twitter)

then they all watched CBS for the video of the people at the hospitals and then his mansion. (youtube)

he also remembered was how all the pretty gals cried and fainted and there pictures everywhere on the newspapers. (facebook)

but the most important thing he remembered was how the country just stopped. stopped what they were doing and played elvis all day every day for an entire week and it bugged the shit out of him. (tumblr)

then he went back to oggle the pretty girls.

well i guess if king of rock and roll wasn’t good enough for his attention, the king of pop won’t either. i remember where i was when tupac shakur died, though, i was eating bugs.

so i guess in another 25 years when some punk ass kid asks me in a starbucks asks me what it was like when MJ died, i guess i’ll know what to say. lots of twittering, lots of youtubing, lots of tumblring, and lots of regret that i worked all day in a starbucks. with lots of hotties. then i’ll tell them to get off their newfangled tech bullshit and stop staring at 3d holograms. and, who knows? maybe by that time they would have cloned and all three men would be chilling, drinking a blended strawberries and creme frappuccinos, staring at hottie jailbaits, too.